{"id":329,"date":"2017-08-20T14:07:17","date_gmt":"2017-08-20T14:07:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jonathanharker.co.uk\/theghostlyworld\/?p=329"},"modified":"2022-10-26T10:29:44","modified_gmt":"2022-10-26T10:29:44","slug":"shut-in","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jonathanharker.co.uk\/theghostlyworld\/shut-in\/","title":{"rendered":"Shut in"},"content":{"rendered":"

by Joe Stanley<\/span><\/p>\n

I<\/span>‘VE HAD IT WITH THIS WORLD. I’m sick of this place and all the idiots out there. At this point, I look forward to the day when death grants me the peace of oblivion. I will rest far beyond the reach of stupidity. <\/span>No, I’m not giving up. You won’t be rid of me so easily. I wouldn’t give you the satisfaction of feeling sorry for me. You want someone to pity? Go look in a mirror, because you’re pathetic.<\/span><\/p>\n

I wish you had listened to me. There’s so much I could tell you about things you can’t even conceive. I worked really hard in my studies. I unearthed some truths you wouldn’t believe. You had the chance to listen, as far as I’m concerned, it’s your loss.<\/span><\/p>\n

I’m glad I own this house. This place is my fortress, its walls keep the world out. And that’s just the way I like it. No TV, no phone, no computer, I have everything I need, especially solitude.<\/span><\/p>\n

I think I’m getting sick, though. I feel cold all the time and my appetite isn’t what it used to be. I haven’t eaten anything today. I don’t think my stomach can take it. After the last few days, especially…<\/span><\/p>\n

I’ve never felt that kind of pain before. And I think…<\/span><\/p>\n

I think there’s something wrong. Something is really, really wrong.<\/span><\/p>\n

But I can’t go to the doctor. I can’t stand the thought of going outside, out into the world I despise, asking, no, begging for its help. And what if…<\/span><\/p>\n

What if the doctor tells me I’m right?<\/span><\/p>\n

Shouldn’t I face this with dignity? Haven’t I had a good, long life?<\/span><\/p>\n

I’m probably making more out of it than I should.<\/span><\/p>\n

It’s probably that smell, that sickening, unwashed, fetid, infected smell. It’s enough to turn a stomach of cast iron.<\/span><\/p>\n

I’ve looked all over the house for what’s making that stink. I suspect it may be in the crawlspace beneath the floor. Or, oh God forbid, it’s in the ducts somewhere. That would explain it, why it smells so bad everywhere.<\/span><\/p>\n

I’ll bet it would cost a pretty penny to have some “professional” come out and take care of that.<\/span><\/p>\n

And how mortifying it would be to let them in here with all these gnats around. It’s not like I leave rotten food sitting around. They come from wherever that smell comes from. They’re almost as irritating as you are, buzzing in my face and ears all the time.<\/span><\/p>\n

They’d cart me off to a home somewhere. I bet that would just make you smile, wouldn’t it? “That poor old man,” you’d say in that condescending, disingenuous way you have.<\/span><\/p>\n

You want to see what’s really wretched, world? Like I said, you just go up to the mirror and you look in like this and…<\/span><\/p>\n

Oh.<\/span><\/p>\n

Well, I guess that explains the smell.<\/span><\/p>\n

There are worms under my skin, I can see them crawling around. It doesn’t hurt, it’s just itchy.<\/span><\/p>\n

It didn’t hurt until I tried to use the shotgun. Now it won’t stop hurting. And my head…<\/span><\/p>\n

Do I have to go on forever like this?<\/span><\/p>\n

Oh, how stupid I’ve been. I’m sorry. I hope you understand how sorry I am…<\/span><\/p>\n

-end-<\/span><\/p>\n

back to previous episode<\/a><\/p>\n

\u00a0 forward to next episode<\/a><\/p>\n

back to list of stories<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

by Joe Stanley I‘VE HAD IT WITH THIS WORLD. I’m sick of this place and all the idiots out there. At this point, I look forward to the day when death grants me the peace of oblivion. I will rest far beyond the reach of stupidity. No, I’m not giving up. You won’t be rid […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[113],"tags":[8,133],"class_list":["post-329","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-joe-stanley","tag-joe-stanley","tag-shut-in"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jonathanharker.co.uk\/theghostlyworld\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/329","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jonathanharker.co.uk\/theghostlyworld\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jonathanharker.co.uk\/theghostlyworld\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jonathanharker.co.uk\/theghostlyworld\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jonathanharker.co.uk\/theghostlyworld\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=329"}],"version-history":[{"count":11,"href":"https:\/\/jonathanharker.co.uk\/theghostlyworld\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/329\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2747,"href":"https:\/\/jonathanharker.co.uk\/theghostlyworld\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/329\/revisions\/2747"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jonathanharker.co.uk\/theghostlyworld\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=329"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jonathanharker.co.uk\/theghostlyworld\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=329"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jonathanharker.co.uk\/theghostlyworld\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=329"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}